Moving Along

Captain's Blog: Sea date 12, July, 2014

The captain has been experiencing choppy waters since the last account. He has been doing everything in his power to do some soul searching while navigating the icy conditions that have crossed his path since the break up. He's come across some absolutes that can never be wavered about himself, no matter what the situation calls for. Then there are some things that demand his attention on fixing.

So, let's backtrack a bit. Earlier this week, the captain discovered that he had a Pinterest account that was still attached to the ex. Being the idiot he is, (no worries, this turns out better in the end, so save your "What the Fuck?!?!?"s), decided to check out what was being posted. It's a good thing he did, because it's just what he needed to move along.

He first made the discovery because of an email that showed who updated things on their profiles. Curiosity peaked and he decided to click it. This was his reaction when he saw what he had seen on the page in front of him...

The captain wanted to throw shit overboard!!!

The ex made it seem like everything was all his fault and that she never had any hand in the shit that went down. Sure, the captain cannot claim innocence, however, the situation was a two way street and she never wanted to communicate about the issues going on. When she did, it was to tell the captain to get over it. Easier said than done when the issue is waking the captain up 5 or 6 times in the middle of the night when he had to be up and at work by 6:30AM. But, the captain digresses...

Now, the captain is having trouble finding the one image that was posted that just solidified it for him, but he can summarize to the extent of it saying "Leaving you doesn't mean I hate you, it means I respect you", but then followed that with the caption, "but there are some people that I just HATE!" Maybe the captain was reading into things and that caption wasn't meant for me specifically, but if you guys haven't known the captain long enough, you should know that he always thinks that things like that are directed at him. So, he's just gonna take it as directed at him and use it as fuel to get the hell out of these rough waters as quick as possible.

With all that said, this revelation doesn't necessarily make things any easier on him, it just makes it easier for him to extend a certain finger in the general direction of the ex's current domicile as he drives past on the highway.

However, the captain sails onward.

He is at the very least gaining some positivity in all of this. Through the help of some old high school friends, the captain definitely knows that nothing will cause him to compromise his integrity when it comes to picking up women.

You see, boys and girls. When it comes to the opposite sex, the captain was raised on one simple ground rule. Women are not to be treated as objects. The captain wants to show the utmost respect for whomever he is in a relationship with. Now obviously, the captain is only human, and seeing as how this is his 3rd break up (all of which being the other's decision) This respect alone is not enough. The captain has learned that, apparently, if he has a problem with something in the relationship and addresses it, he's the bad guy and must deal with it and never speak of it again, but rest assured if there is a problem they have with the captain, he'd better fix it fast or his ass is getting left in the dust. But, again, the captain digresses...

The captain is not looking for sex in a relationship. He is on the hunt for someone that will give the same love and devotion that he gives in the relationship, a certain reciprocation that he has not found yet. Unfortunately, the captain seems to blind himself in the midst of the relationship and has dealt with the fact that he has not experienced true reciprocation.

Is the captain doomed to float around in this sea forever searching for this White Whale? "When Lord? When? When's gonna be my time?!?!?"

Though it seems that the captain is only able to focus on the negative, there are bright pieces in his life. He has had many friends and family (I shall refer to them as crew mates in future reference) come to his side, even though there are times he just wants to lock himself in his room and not be disturbed.

In a few days, the captain's First Mate shall be returning from a trip abroad, and this is when I believe the captain shall be breaking out of his funk in no time.

For now, I shall keep the sails down and keep drifting onward.

Until the next entry, smooth sailing to all.

Much bandaged and stitched love,

HR